Attack on Punishment Center Blue!

Image of Pirate Fleet provided by Spy satellite Virgin-Sprint #801

Captain Grognard rolled his lucky D20. He rolled a ‘1’. It was a bad omen.

“Preparing to cut jump drives,” Johnson on helm announced.

Grognard leaned back in his command chair. The only thing this plan had going for it was sheer audacity. People just don’t attack Maximum Security Prisons. He was hoping the stupid bravery of the act would be enough to rescue the wealthy incarcerated man they had been sent to rescue. Four hundred MegaCreds bought a lot of bravery.

Still, his eyes drifted down to the ‘1’ he rolled. 

“Entering real space!” Johnson cried.

Punishment Center Blue image provided by Wal-Targ-3 Security Satellite

Punishment Center Blue appeared on the monitor. It was huge. The folly of attacking it was obvious. They should run now while they could.

“All ships are accounted for,” Isis reported on sensors.

“Attack!” Grognard commanded.

The Reroll surged forward. Omega Murder Comet took a position slightly back and to starboard. The smaller Slapstick took their position to Omega Murder Comet’s starboard while the equally small Recursive Function took their place to The Reroll’s port.

Grognard took a deep breath. The Reroll was the front point of the formation to absorb as much fire as it could from the prison. He prayed to the Gods of Dice and Wargames that they could survive the pounding.

“Open fire!” he commanded. They were at long range but you never knew, they might get lucky.

He watched as the pirate fleet sent a barrage of concentrated lasers and plasma towards the prison. Barely half of the shots reached the prison and those that did hammered what was considered a weak point of shields. He had hoped the focused volley could cause a shield failure. Instead, the shields easily held.

“Return fire incoming!”

Grognard gasped at the multitude of lasers headed their way. He knew the prison was well armed but he didn’t quite grasp just how well armed until now. Fortunately they were still at long range and most of the shots were easy to evade. They wouldn’t have that luxury for much longer.

“They are calling for help,” Isis reported.

“Of course they are, keep firing!” Grognard yelled. They were within optimal targeting range; the fleet’s combined fire might crack the prison’s shields this time.

The prison’s shields held. The pirate fleet managed to hit it more times than last but they still couldn’t crack those shields.

Grognard watched another storm of lasers come from the prison. He watched with dismay as they rained onto The Reroll’s shields.

***
Captain Randy Deathspasm stood on the bridge of Omega Murder Comet. He screaming a long piercing yell into his microphone club as the prison fired upon him. Over the ship communication system, a hundred electric guitars howled their support.

“The Reroll has been hit!” 1st Bass/Tactical officer Lita Fire reported. “Their missile bays have been destroyed!”

“Do they want us to take lead position?” Deathspasm asked. The return fire from the prison had been brutal. He couldn’t wait to risk body and soul.

“Negative!” reported 2nd Guitar/Sensors officer Tokie Slaughter. “They say to hold position.

Deathspasm grinned in appreciation. “I knew Grognard was the right man to follow. That man is metal.”

***
Captain Ticklepoke threw a pie at the back of the head of the helmsman. The bridge crew laughed as he struggled keep their ship flying straight and now kill them all by the crashing into Omega Murder Comet.

Ticklepoke smiled. It was good to keep crew morale up and clowns loved a pie hit. Too bad they couldn’t get a blasted hit through the prison’s shields.

“The Reroll is dropping back and the Omega Murder Comet is taking lead!” Candy Carl reported on sensors.

“Better the Comet than us,” Ticklepoke said. The Slapstick was supposed to take lead next if the Comet got damaged. The thought of the Class Three Marauder absorbing fire from the massive prison was such a ridiculous idea that Ticklepoke was impressed. Grognard did have a sense of humor.

She watched the monitor as the pirate fleet continued to concentrate on a single point in the shields. To her complete surprise, one of the prison shields collapsed!

“Only three more to destroy!” Ticklepoke said sarcastically. Her crew laughed at the futility of their certain death.

***
Captain Atheta-3 watched the monitor with one cybernetic eye. Her other eye read calculations and battle predictions from every crewmember of the Recursive Function. Everyone was in agreement, this was not going well.

Exclusive Image from the attempted prison break provided by Spy Satellite Virgin-Sprint #801

Atheta-3 felt a strange emotion she didn’t recognize at first. Oh yes, it was fear. How interesting. She relished the long forgotten emotion for the novelty that it was.

“Reroll has ordered missile launch,” Alpni-89 reported.

“Launch missile,” Atheta-3 confirmed.

She watched sensor reports tick in. Punishment Center Blue had an impressive anti-missile array. Missile after missile homed in on the stationry prison only to be shot down. One missile from Omega Murder Comet made it through to cause superficial structural damage to the prison’s hull.

The crew's collective conscious reached a decision. Boarding was their only hope for mission success. This was Grognard’s assessment as well which was why the plan involved a risky dash to the prison. Atheta-3 made a note on the accuracy of Grognard’s assessment. He was the right choice for fleet leader.

Omega Murder Comet absorbed the bulk of the prison’s return fire. A wing of the pirate ship exploded. Hull damage estimates were made and conclusions were that it was a non-fatal blow.

“Wal-Targ reinforcements have arrived!” reported Delted-21. Classification: Frigate, identification: Synergy. Classification: Destroyer, identification: Monetize. Classification: Destroyer, identification: Assests.”

Atheta-3 ran a risk evaluation. Three ships versus the fleet was a minimal risk. Three ships with the support of the prison was a high risk. Survivability was only 3 percent.

She wondered what conclusion the technologically handicapped Grognard would come to. She prepared mutiny protocols if he gave an unsound command.

“Reroll has ordered the retreat!” Alpni-89 reported.

“Activate jump drives to rendezvous point,” Atheta-3 commanded.

Mission was a failure. Survival was secured. Atheta-3 added these facts to the collective’s debate on the continuation of maintaining this relationship with their pirate partners.