A Pirate Conference

“Welcome, Captains,” Captain Grognard said to his guests. “I have been approached to do something highly illegal and more importantly, highly profitable.”

That got their attention. Captain Deathspasm pressed a button on his ear to lower the volume of the internal music that was always playing. Captain Ticklepoke was about to comically spill her ale but she paused to hear him out. Captain Atheta-3 turned her head barely ten degrees towards him, which for a cyborg like her, was the equivalent of her leaning forward.

“Our target is this,” Grognard said. He pressed a button and hologram of a giant space prison appeared before them. “Punishment Center Blue is the largest prison under Wal-Targ-3 control. It houses several million criminals. One of those criminals would like to be rescued and he is willing to pay a lot for it.”

“Fact: No one has ever escaped from Punishment Center Blue,” Atheta-3 said.

“That ship has more guns than Candy Carl has cavities,” Captain Ticklepoke said.

“That is one big drokking station,” Captain Deathspasm said.

“Yes, but we have a really big prisoner to save,” Grognard said. He pressed a button and the face of an old man appeared. “Meet Hap Vinnt. He was until recently one a Minister of Purchasing for Wal-Targ-3. He was convicted of embezzling, theft of luxury items, cooperation with pirates and granting employees higher than minimum wage. He has been sentenced to sixteen life sentences and is currently in solitary confinement. He wants to be rescued and I agreed to give it a try.”

“Drok,” Captain Deathspasm said. “That will be suicide.” The way he said it didn’t sound like a complaint but the other two Captains nodded in agreement.

“He is offering 400 MegaCreds if we rescue him,” Grognard said.

Ticklepoke whistled. It was a long whistle that kept going, and going, and going. After a full minute, she sputtered hilariously for air.

“That is a lot of guitars,” Captain Deathspasm said. He was grinning.

“Repeat, no one has ever escaped from Punishment Center Blue?” Atheta-3 said.

“That is good,” Grognard said. “It gives us the element of surprise.”

Atheta-3 stared at him as she read data being beamed directly into her eyes. “Their defenses may be untested and reinforcements could be slow to act.”

“That would buy a lot of guitars,” Deathspasm said again.

“If we manage to break in, we could also steal all those cool looking prison suits!” Ticklepoke said.

“Sure,” Grognard said. If the clown pirate wanted prison suits, she could have them. As long as she added their ship to the fleet, she could grab whatever she wanted.

“Reward outweighs risk,” Atheta-3 said. “My collective will aid you in this objective.”

“We’re going on a prison break!” Ticklepoke said. She clapped and fell out of her chair.

“That would buy a lot of guitars,” Deathspasm said disbelievingly. “And attacking the prison would make for one hell of a song.”

Grognard smiled. “We leave tonight. Let’s go do the impossible.”